damn near killed 'um! OR i hardly know her!

i don't know what made me think of this, but about 10 years ago, i was using a 14400 baud (i bet you don't even know what a baud is) modem on RICNet, a BBS service run by the local newspaper. anyway, i was in a chat with brian, and we were talking about how return of the jedi was about to be broadcast on tv. i think it went something like this.

speller (that's me): dude rotj is on usa tonight!
careider (good pun, or his mom's initials? how about both?): mom is watching.
speller: she's watching it already? it's not on til 8!
careider: hello tom
speller: how is she watching if it's not on yet?
speller: tell me you rectumsnatcher!
careider: thats not nice to say
...
careider: you don't want me to tell terri about rs do you

rectumsnatcher?! what the hell? anyway, it turned out that "mom is watching" did not mean that brian's mom was watching return of the jedi, but rather watching our conversation in progress. and then typing to me. i called brian's mom a rectumsnatcher. this was a word that i had never used before and have never used since (until this post of course). there are no google hits for it as such and one hit in its hyphenated form. it's not like we were going around calling each other rectum snatchers. although at the time, beavis and butthead were calling each other "buttmunch" and "bungwipe" so it probably stemmed from that. anyway, yeah.

==============
epilogue: yes, by the way, my username was speller, because i was on the spelling bee team.

longeron
ulterior
somnolently
lapideous

the four words that were the bane of my 5th through 8th grade existence. then, in 8th grade, my then-arch-nemesis gregory phillips, II (YES HE USED THE ROMAN NUMERALS WHEN HE WROTE HIS NAME AND PROBABLY STILL DOES) won the county spelling bee. it was a dark day for yours truly, friends, a dark day indeed.

PS he got out the year before on "nonplus". so if you ever see him, ask him if he is nonplussed. that is, if he's even still alive. i feel like he's one of those people that have fallen off the earth. greg, if you're out there, drop me a line, we'll swap blogs or something.